Congratulations! He popped the question and you said YES. For some women, at the very moment he slips that ring on her finger, they turn into a nervous, stressed, and sometimes, mean person who their family & friends have never seen before.
Why does this happen?
If you consider that most women have dreamt of this moment since they were 5 years old, you come to realize that a lot of time, planning and emotion have already been spent trying to make this moment perfect. Wedding Planning often makes laid-back and usually easy-going women crazy and neurotic.
So, how do you get through one of the most incredible, but often overwhelming, times in your life, while keeping your family & friends? By NOT doing the following things:
1. Do NOT be mean or rude – This is should be very obvious, but unfortunately it is not. Stress can make you turn ugly and trust me, no one likes a stressed Bride. Remember, no matter what happens, at the end of the day, you will be married to the love of your life. It doesn’t matter if it rains, the cake wasn’t what you expected, or your weird Uncle Eddy got drunk and hit on every girl above 20. YOU WILL BE MARRIED!
2. Do NOT emulate Bridezillas – Seriously. If you fancy yourself a Bridezilla, you have to stop and reevaluate your attitude. Most Bridezillas (in my humble opinion) need a spanking & then therapy – a lot of therapy. Why do some Brides feel it is their right to be an adult toddler just because it is their wedding? I haven’t figured that out, but I have seen it and it is NOT PRETTY.
3. Do NOT assume the wedding is all about you – of course it isn’t! Remember that really cute guy who gave you that ring? Its about him too! Oh, and your families who helped you get where you are. Look, a wedding is about love and the joining of families. To think it is all about the Bride is arrogant and just plain wrong.
4. Do NOT pick dresses that are outrageously expensive or that don’t look good on every body type – Your Bridesmaids will most likely never wear this dress again. BE KIND. Not just to their pocket book, but to their body type. If I had to wear a dress that was made for a 5’9 model who only eats broccoli, I would be screwed. Give them options. Get a dress that comes in several different styles. Let them add sleeves if you want. Honestly, the focus will not be on them (unless you make it so by putting a 5’3, 200 lb woman in a dress made for Angelina Jolie). Also, choose a color shoe & let them get their own. They will be more comfortable & they will love you for it.
5. Do NOT abuse your vendors – This is a big one. Your lack of planning does not constitute an emergency on their part & if you are a personality type who LOVES to worry & stress, don’t expect the vendors to react well to that. We event professionals LOVE to help you have a beautiful wedding. Most of us are very good at it. We are not out to make millions off of you. We like to make enough to feed our families, pay for school books, or maybe take a vacation once every 5 years. Please speak nicely to us, don’t patronize us & for the love of God, do not try to do our jobs. Our goal is to exceed your expectation, but if you are constantly changing those, it’s really hard to hit a moving target. Do your research, hire good, reputable vendors and you will be great.
6. Do NOT try to ruin a vendors career if they didn’t provide the services you paid for – If you are unhappy, talk to them. Perfection is rarely attained. Mistakes happen, but that is just what they are – MISTAKES. If you cannot get rectification by working with the vendor, go to the BBB or take them to court. Remember, while you may be angry – it is not right to slander anyone on social media. That is all too common these days and it is so wrong. Not only that, you could be sued and you will most likely lose. Be an adult and try to get it corrected yourself. If that doesn’t work – take them to court.
7. Don’t get drunk – Seriously, hard to find something any more unattractive than a Bride that is wasted. It might be funny for a few minutes, but that gets old – and embarrassing quick. Trust me, you don’t want that to be what everyone remembers from your wedding.
8. Do NOT forget to be grateful – Everyone works hard putting a wedding together. Make sure you let your family know how grateful you are for their help, financial contribution and support. It takes a village to raise a child – so thank them!!
A wedding is a joyous thing. Forget about the small things. They are nice, but not the focus of the day. Who cares if your pinterest idea fell apart? Trust me, no one else does. They are there to celebrate the beginning of your new life. Enjoy that. Soak it all in and you will have memories that last a lifetime.